Today is October 2, 2015-

For the first time to day, I cried about a mass shooting (UCC, Oregon)
Yesterday I was angry, now I am just sad.
I live in a country where this is perfectly normal; I should be surprised by this shooting or by the 5 people shot in Baltimore today, but I'm not.

I live in a country where someone will post my address online if I say something controversial.

I live in a country where I can buy a gun in under an hour and end as many lives as I want in less than a day, but  I have to wait three days for an abortion.

I have a right to live the life I want, and no one with a gun, keyboard, or picket sign has the right to hurt me over it.

Getting into the newer stuff.....

[I wrote this for an old friend who's affection I don't think I will ever truly be able to let go of, and who's hand I wish I could still hold when the world gets to scary. He's the only one who never had to say that he understood what was wrong with me, and what we had been through, no matter how different, had left us very much the same. He swore to me once that he cared for me more than he had ever cared for another human, and I still carry that with me, and wish he could be a part of my life now, even though we haven't really spoken for along time. I'm not a great song writer, but this still expressed everything I felt when we first went our separate ways.]

It could have been you

Layin next to me

Like we were always meant to be

If you could have just loved me too.

I loved you unconditionally

Until the day you set me free

I thought we'd always make it through

Right now I'd be sitting on your kitchen counter

Watching you cook dinner an' drinking all your beer

Talking about the things you love about her

Yet I never got jealous of your career

It could have been you layin next to me,

But I lost a war with your sense of duty.

I never knew how much you loved your country

while having breakfast like lovers at the cafe

that walk of shame sort of simple beauty

then you left me roses- goodbye lost in the bouquet 

Right now I'd be sitting on your kitchen counter

Watching you cook dinner and drinking your beer

You would tell me how much you love her

The personification of your military career

I'd be lying if I said I wanted that life

I never woulda made it as a military wife

So no more breakfasts at the monument cafe,

I left Williamson county and my hometown,

Packed up my life and moved away,

To get far from you and the ghosts I'd found

Cause that ol county seat has been haunting me

Driving right through is a guarantee

That the memories are alive and well

And I'm left missing you like hell.

I left Williamson county and my hometown

To get far from you and the ghosts I'd found